


Ending and Beginning

by hh7798



Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Post-Endgame
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-23
Updated: 2019-10-23
Packaged: 2020-12-28 21:22:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21143411
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hh7798/pseuds/hh7798
Summary: In this story, another possibility of the relationship between the Command team (Janeway and Chakotay) following their return to Earth is explored.





	Ending and Beginning

=/\=

_ 2407_

The large Indiana home was filled with laughter and noise on that evening. It was not often occupied, for its owners worked in San Francisco at the Starfleet Headquarters. But, tonight, it was full.

The 30th anniversary of the return of the Federation starship _Voyager_ to earth would occur next week. Over the course of the next seven days, all of the former crew and their families would gather in San Francisco. However, a few of them had decided to meet up a bit early in Indiana.

In the living room, the adults held a lively conversation as the oldest grandchildren (who were approximately five) played on the floor. On one couch, the larger beige one, sat both pairs of the children’s grandparents. Admiral Kathryn Janeway was comfortably settled next to her husband, Admiral Chakotay, and beside them sat their old friends and in-laws, Lieutenants Tom and B’Elanna Paris. Time had been kind to both of these couples. Yes, they were all a bit more wrinkled and had a few gray streaks in their hair, but the foursome of them did not look that different than they had thirty years before. Across from them on the smaller yellow loveseat, their children, Carl and Kotryn Paris held hands and shared a laugh at Tom’s story. These two could not have been more suited for each other.

Kotryn was a true beauty; she had inherited her mother Kathryn’s dark blue eyes and size, but her father’s raven hair and strong features. As she grew more experienced, her Starfleet career had ascended rapidly, and she now served as chief engineer on the _U.S.S. Valiance _under the promising captain Carl Paris. Though he was half Klingon, her husband Carl did not look it, for not a single ridge graced his forehead. Nevertheless, most of his family would agree that in addition to having his father’s sky blue eyes, and his mother’s chocolate hair, he had indeed received the Klingon temper. This was just one of the aspects where Kotryn and he balanced each other out. His hastiness and her clear headiness were the perfect combination. The two Paris and four Janeway children had been best friends their entire lives, but Kotryn and Carl had always shared something special. Now married, they had three children together.

A cry from the bedroom off of the living room drew the attention of Kathryn who silently stood and went to care for her crying youngest grandchild.

In the acting nursery, baby Lanryn was restless. Despite that she was one quarter Klingon, her appearance did not show it either. Kathryn scooped up the sobbing infant, rocking her gently. Chakotay had slipped in and was enjoying watching his wife care for their grandchild. Sensing someone in the room, Kathryn turned tensely, but relaxed and smiled when she realized the person was Chakotay. “She’s so beautiful,” remarked Kathryn lovingly.

Stepping forward to play with the baby’s fingers, Chakotay responded, “Just like her mother and grandmother.” As his wife rolled her eyes, he continued, “Seems like yesterday Kotryn was this small.”

Kathryn laughed and stated, “Oh, Kotryn. We did everything wrong.”

Returning her smile, Chakotay replied, “Yes, but she turned out all right.”

Janeway passed her fidgety granddaughter to her husband, watching as he rocked her tenderly. “We turned out all right too, you know. There was a time when I never thought we would be here, together.”

Chakotay answered seriously, “There were many times I never thought we would be together, especially after _Voyager_ landed. You were so distant.”

“And you were with Seven,” retorted his wife gently.

“Only for a short time,” he reminded her and continued, “Then, we had that first awkward re-acquaintance in Astrometrics. Remember?”

With a fond smile and chuckle, she replied, “Oh, yes. Those are the good old days.” Lanryn had finally fallen asleep, comforted by the nurturing of her grandfather. Placing her gently back in her crib, Chakotay put his arm around Kathryn’s shoulders and guided her back into the living room with the rest of their family.

_2377, The day_ Voyager_ returns_

For what would be one of the last times, she knew, Kathryn Janeway walked into the Ready Room of _Voyager_. She sat slowly behind the desk, thinking of all the memories this room held. She allowed the many of the happy moments, tragic experiences, arguments, and decisions that had all occurred in this place flash before her eyes.

On the Bridge, Commander Chakotay knew the nostalgia that was hitting his Captain hard, and, not wanting her to be alone, he went to talk to her. Leaving his seat, another officer quickly came and took his place.

The door beeped. Kathryn said, “Come in,” already knowing that it was Chakotay.

He asked with a gentle smile, “Am I interrupting?”

With her usual seriousness, she replied softly, “Not at all.”

“We’ve made it. We’re home,” reminded Chakotay.

“Yes, and for that I’m thankful. But, for seven years, this ship has been our home, this crew a family. It’s going to be hard to say ‘Good-bye’,” Kathryn mused.

“This crew survived the Borg, the Hirogen, and a macro virus, just to name a few of the obstacles. We can make it through separation,” insisted the Commander.

“Yes, we can,” answered the Captain emotionally. Glancing out the window on her right, she broached the topic she did not desire to discuss. “I heard you have a new friend.”

“You mean Seven?” he asked, trying to gauge Kathryn’s reaction as she impassively nodded. “How did you know?” continued Chakotay.

“Because I’m the Captain of this ship, there is not much about my senior officers that I don’t know,” retorted Kathryn.

“It’s not what you think,” began the Commander just as her combadge chirped and she received a request to come to the Bridge.

Seeming not to hear his attempted explanations, Kathryn Janeway stood and faced him directly, put her hand on her first officer’s shoulder, and looked deep into his eyes. “Chakotay, I just want you to be happy.” To most people, the warm glance she gave him would have been satisfactory and convincing, but he was not just anyone. Chakotay had spent seven years discerning her thoughts before she said them aloud, and they often communicated without words. He could see straight through her. She was hurt by his relationship with Seven of Nine, although she was desperately trying to hide it, trying to be strong like always. He did not quite know what to say, but no words were required. Kathryn Janeway turned towards the door and walked back onto the Bridge, her very conflicted Commander following.

_2377, Three nights after_ Voyager_ returns_

At the Starfleet Headquarters in San Francisco, there was a large banquet hall that was rarely used. However, the third night after the return of the starship _Voyager_, a ceremony was being held there to commend the crew of this ship. With many important dignitaries as well as top ranking Starfleet officials in attendance, it was good that the main room was enormous, with a small stage and nearly a hundred tables set up on one side and a large, empty space to be used later for dancing on the other. The event had already been going on for over an hour, during which a delicious meal had been consumed. Next, Admiral Paris would be calling up each and every member of the crew to receive their promotions and acclaim.

Each came to the stage and shook hands with the man. In the dim lighting of the dark floored room, the stage seemed to fairly glow. Beginning with the lowest members of the crew, the Admiral worked his way up in calling their names. Soon, he had only the eight senior officers to call up. Over the past couple of days, Starfleet had undergone the work of sifting through years of _Voyager _logs. Although further investigation was still needed, enough of the records had been processed that the upper Starfleet brass had been able to discern what promotions should be given to which members. All of the ex-Maquis members were given the same treatment as the rest of the crew, much to the relief of those who had been aboard the ship. As Harry Kim was called to the stage, his friends and family lit up with pride. This young man had been the epitome of Starfleet excellence on _Voyager_, but there had been no room for promotions on a ship that size. Now, he could finally reap the benefits of his labor over the past seven years. In more than a few words, he was congratulated on his exemplary service and granted the rank of a Lieutenant. At that moment, the light from the smile on his face could not have been rivaled by even the sun.

Next, Admiral Paris rather emotionally summoned two people, Tom and B’Elanna Paris, to the stage. The Admiral had fairly shunned his son prior to the disappearance of _Voyager_. For a while, the senior Paris thought that his son was lost forever. Yet, the time the Admiral had never thought he would have with his son was now a reality. And, when the ship had finally returned, Tom was now a responsible man, with a lovely wife and child. Both father and son seemed to have a hard time keeping an impassive face as they shook hands and the Admiral began to speak. Tom and B’Elanna were both given the rank of Commander and as the pair left the stage, the grin on Tom’s face equaled that of the one on his father’s.

The Doctor was beckoned to the stage subsequently, even though he was a hologram. He was granted what was most important to him: rights as a human being, on the grounds that his service on _Voyager_ had gone beyond the limits of holographic technology. He was clearly pleased with this development, especially when Admiral Paris stated that the Doctor’s program was to be the template for a whole new set of holograms that would have the potential to also become individuals.

Tuvok was granted the rank of Commodore, higher than a Captain but not quite a Vice Admiral. His lack of expression seemed to amuse the Admiral, whose face more than made up for the blankness of Tuvok. However, to those who knew him best, it seemed that Tuvok was more moved than most had ever seen him. His wife, in the audience, looked as though she was stretching the Vulcan limits of emotion.

Seven of Nine was not granted a Starfleet rank, for she had expressed no desire to join the organization. Instead, she was given an honorary degree, making her Doctor Annika Hansen. It was announced that she would become a professor at the Starfleet Academy and a valued consultant among those with ranks. She seemed quite touched by the degree. For those who knew her, one could almost see the images flashing before Seven’s eyes as she accepted the honor with grace and humility. She had come so far since being liberated from the Borg collective, and no one could be prouder of her than Captain Janeway.

On the stage, Commander Chakotay was visibly touched to be standing on at Starfleet headquarters on Earth, the thankfulness at being re-integrated into Starfleet with such ease apparent by his expression. Admiral Paris gave him the rank of Captain, and he was assigned to _Voyager_. It appeared that this ship would have a new captain, one who seemed rather conflicted over this job. He still seemed pleased, but now there was a haunting look to his smile as though he was recalling all the memories from his time on this ship. Some watched Kathryn Janeway’s response to this announcement, but she seemed surprisingly relieved at this news.

When it was her turn to take the stage, Kathryn Janeway rose from her seat and strode towards the podium with the same purposefulness she had shown daily aboard _Voyager_. Although the Admiral was at least a head taller than her, Janeway did not seem dwarfed or daunted by the powerful man in front of her. Perhaps this confidence came from her face offs with menacing enemies such as the Hirogen or the Borg. Regardless, there she stood to be recognized for the returning of her ship and its crew after traveling for seven years and over seventy thousand light years. Admiral Paris’ praise of Janeway was met with thunderous applause as he awarded the former Captain of the Federation Starship _Voyager_ the rank of Vice Admiral.

The ceremony concluded, the musicians began to play their sweet melodies and the guests began to dance. As Chakotay and Seven danced rhythmically, Tom and B’Elanna held each other close and swayed in time to the music. Tom’s red Starfleet dress uniform matched nicely with B’Elanna’s floor length, dusty pink gown. The style was elegant and bore traces of her Klingon heritage. Seven had picked a rather simple dress that was the exact shade of her eyes. Although she and Chakotay did not match, one could not mistake that these two were a couple. This togetherness was unmistakable not because of their loving looks, but because of the closeness they maintained. Yet, it was not this pair that stood out, but the figure in the floor length dress the exact shade of command red that she had worn daily for the past seven years: Kathryn Janeway. Basking in the light of their return, she was practically radiant and was swept away by a different man each song, never free for a single dance. Yet, those who knew her best could see beneath the smile and could distinguish sorrow and regret.

B’Elanna Paris was in a conniving mood, and thus she went to her father-in-law and told him what she had noted. Kathryn Janeway had danced with every male in attendance except Chakotay. The Admiral consequently made an announcement. “Now,” he began, “We will have a dance in honor of the two that made this night possible. Admiral Janeway and Captain Chakotay, please give us the pleasure of a Command team dance.” Thus, the pair made their way to the center, arriving at the same moment. As the band struck up a slow song, the lone couple slowly danced in the center of the room. “Good evening, Kathryn,” said Chakotay.

“Hello, Chakotay,” she replied, meeting his eyes and speaking to him for the first time that night. It was not that they had been avoiding each other but simply that they had not come in contact.

“This feels like a dream, like if I yell too loudly, it will be over. Or if I say, ‘Computer, end the program’, it will all fade away,” revealed Chakotay.

“But, this is quite real,” Kathryn responded with a gentle smile that he returned. They continued to speak in low tones, obviously very comfortable with each other. To the casual observer, the pair just seemed to be enjoying this dance as the close friends they were, but, to them, it was the culmination of a relationship that would never be.

Off to the side, B’Elanna noted to her husband, “That is the first time this entire evening those two have smiled genuinely.”

“Oh, come one, B’Elanna. Please, don’t try and play matchmaker. Chakotay is already in a relationship,” retorted Tom Paris.

“But, the Vice Admiral, Chakotay, and Seven have all looked miserable the entire evening to those who know them best,” protested B’Elanna. At the skeptical glance from Tom, she reminded him, “We spent seven years with those people. We know them well enough to see through their façades. I know this is not what they thought it would be.”

“Okay, so maybe you are right,” acknowledged Tom. “But, what are you going to do about it besides get them to dance together?”

“What if we get Harry to talk to Seven? The doubt has been clearest on her face tonight. The other two are just too stubborn to listen to any reasoning from us,” plotted his wife.

“That may not work, you know. It sounds great theoretically, but would it actually succeed?” questioned Tom.

“There’s one way to find out,” whispered B’Elanna. With that, the Parises fell into silence as the song came to a conclusion and the former command team separated. Kathryn and Chakotay held on to each other for just a moment longer than necessary and glanced unabashedly into each other’s eyes for a brief moment before turning and heading separate ways in the room. These small actions gave B’Elanna hope that perhaps the former Captain and Commander still held the spark that had seemed to burn so bright between them.

_2377, Four nights after _Voyager_’s_ _return_

Putting her plan into action, B’Elanna Paris invited her and her husband’s longtime friend, Harry Kim, over for dinner at their apartment. For now, all of the _Voyager _crew was staying in Starfleet housing surrounding the headquarters. The apartments the senior officers had been given were nice, in a Starfleet manner. The rooms were rather sparse, but the few pieces of furniture were elegant and classy. This created an atmosphere of an efficiency and hominess at the same time. In many ways, the apartments were nicer versions of the quarters on _Voyager_.

In the few minutes before Harry arrived for the meal, the table had already been prepared and Tom was helping his wife with the final touches. “So, how exactly do you plan on convincing Harry to talk to Seven about Chakotay?” inquired Tom.

“Well, since his girlfriend from seven years ago is now happily married, Harry has no attachments. We’ll just get him to go chat with Seven for the sake of the Command team. Maybe he’ll find that he and Seven agree with each other more than they realized,” B’Elanna imagined aloud. A chirp at the door interrupted the thoughts that Tom was about to express to his wife.

“Come in,” called Tom.

“Sorry I’m late. There was this man at Starfleet who claimed to have found an anomaly four thousand light years from Earth. It took us four hours to convince him that he was wrong and another two to persuade him to leave,” commented Harry.

“Forever dealing with difficult people, eh, Harry?” remarked Tom.

With a grin, his friend retorted, “Apparently, it takes one to know one.”

B’Elanna, seeing the expression on Tom’s face as he prepared to reaffirm what Harry had just said, quickly interrupted, “Tom, don’t you dare. Now, come, sit and eat, both of you.”

Exhaling slowly, Tom sarcastically declared as he followed his wife’s instructions, “Yes, ma’am.”

Conversation flowed easily between the old friends as they discussed everything from their new jobs to Starfleet headquarters to their apartments to, finally, the rest of the crew. This was the topic that B’Elanna had desired to discuss, so she took advantage of this opportunity.

“What did you think of Chakotay and Seven the other night?” B’Elanna questioned Harry.

“Honestly, they did not appear to be a couple completely in love. Maybe they kept their affections at bay so they would not hurt the Vice Admiral or perhaps they did not want the media to make a spectacle of them,” responded Harry.

“As much as I disliked her at first, I thought that the Vice Admiral and Chakotay would end up together,” commented B’Elanna as Tom watched her carefully.

“Most of us did. And, last night, during the Command team dance, I remembered why we thought that,” mused Harry.

“The three of them-Chakotay, Seven and the Vice Admiral-did not look as if they were content. Not to me, anyways. Do you think there is anything we can do to make this right?” asked B’Elanna. What she was implying was, “Could we find a way to get Chakotay and the former Captain together without hurting Seven?”

“I’m not sure. The Vice Admiral and Chakotay are too willful to listen to any of our advice. That only leaves Seven to talk to, but, the Vice Admiral was her closest friend and confidant on _Voyager_. I don’t think she would heed anything we have to say,” stated Harry.

B’Elanna knew her plan had reached a critical point and that the happiness of her friends rested on these next few moments. “We need someone who Seven trusts to talk to her. Tom and I have never been close friends with Seven, but-” began B’Elanna.

Suddenly, Harry began to see where this was going. Putting up his hands in protest, Lieutenant Kim objected, “No, no, I won’t do it. The Doctor is perfectly capable and is a trusted confidant of Seven. And, Tuvok sees things the same logical way Seven does, so he could reason with her very well.”

Exchanging a look with B’Elanna, Tom argued, “In light of the ‘deathbed confession’ in which the Doctor said he loves Seven, something she does not seem to return, I don’t think it would be appropriate for the Doctor to talk to Seven.”

Encouraged by Tom’s support, B’Elanna continued, “And, Tuvok does not understand emotions like love and is, in fact, convinced that love is irrelevant in a marriage.”

Harry sighed, knowing that his friends were right and that he had been manipulated rather well into fulfilling this role. “Okay, fine. But, what am I supposed to say?” demanded Harry.

“Oh, come on, buddy. You’ll think of something,” retorted Tom with a laugh. B’Elanna smiled to herself as she stood to fetch dessert. Her mission was accomplished.

_2377, Five days after_ Voyager’s _return_

Trying to stop his hands from shaking slightly, Harry Kim pushed his combadge as said, “Kim to Seven of Nine.” As a courtesy to the crew of _Voyager_, the communication lines between the team members had been kept active so that they could contact each other with just a push of a button. As long as the call was to be made from a person on Earth to another crewman on Earth, the combadges would work. Today, the person this man was contacting was simply Seven, a friend he had known for several years. Yet, he felt like a boy about to go on his first date.

“Yes, Lieutenant,” came the crisp response.

Harry winced at the flatness and even coolness of her tone, but continued, “I’ve been wanting to talk to you, but haven’t gotten the chance. Is there any way we could meet up?”

“Certainly. There is a café just down the street from Headquarters. 1200 hours?” asked Seven after a brief moment’s hesitation.

“I’ll be there,” affirmed Harry as his combadge fell silent. The hours seemed to pass quickly and soon he found himself, doubts and all, at the place he had agreed to get together with Seven

He reserved a table, so that when she walked in, Harry immediately escorted her to their place and they both sat down. The café was a small place, with a bar in the center of the room and little tables and booths around the edges. The walls glowed a dark tan, and the lights were held at just the right balance. One could see his or her food and surroundings clearly but not completely, obscured just enough to foster a feeling of the comfort often found in the dark. The booth where Seven and Harry sat was the color of cranberries in season, contrasting nicely with the light wooden floors. Following an exchange of greetings, the pair fell into small talk for a few minutes.

Finally, Seven point-blank inquired, “This was obviously not just a social call. What is it that you called me here for?”

Taking a deep breath, Harry put his thoughts into a simple question and said, “Are you happy?”

Seven looked at him incredulously and stated, “That is the matter you wished to discuss with me?”

“Well, yes, it is,” responded Harry.

“This hardly warrants an entire meeting,” protested Seven.

“On the contrary, your happiness is very important to me. I can assure you, I only have your best interests at hand. If I have interrupted your schedule or this is something you don’t want to discuss, I won’t consider it rude if you leave,” offered Harry.

She shifted her eyes to the exit for a fraction of a second before sighing and meeting his eyes while agreeing, “I will stay. The answer to your question is, well, not exactly.”

“Any specific reason?” asked Harry.

“I care for Chakotay in a romantic way, but things just are not the same between us since _Voyager _returned to Earth. Over the past few days, I have become aware of the fact that I believe he feels affection for Kathryn Janeway. Since I became aware of this, it seems that my communication with Chakotay has been… strained. I think that he loves her in the way I had hoped he would someday love me,” declared Seven.

Harry wondered aloud, “Why would you say that?”

Seven rejoined, “There are certain details, like the peace and happiness that comes to the faces of the Vice Admiral and the Captain when they are around each other, that until lately would be insignificant to me. But, I have begun to notice these details.”

Harry posed the question, “What are you going to do? Are you going to break up with him?”

After a moment of consideration, Seven responded, “I am uncertain. Even if I did want to do it, I would be unsure of the best method of terminating my relationship with Chakotay.”

“But, that might be the best option. If you are not happy now, what makes you think you will be later?” Harry gently asked. Seven considered this thought for a moment like a child who receives a gift yet doesn’t know what it is. He continued, “Have you talked to him?”

“He has been vigorously denying his feelings, but he insists that even if these feelings existed, he would not let them interfere with our relationship,” Seven factually answered.

Harry said in an ironic tone, “But, you think they have already.”

“In a manner of speaking, yes. However, this may be a good thing. His feelings for someone other than me, no matter how hard he tries to fight them, have thrust me out of my state of bliss. Now, I can think clearly again,” remarked Seven.

With a not mocking but simply amused smile, he told her, “That state of bliss is usually just called love. And, falling out of love often leads to breakups, which are very common in new relationships.”

It was Seven’s turn to ask, “So, you think I should as you put it, ‘break up’ with him.”

“Only if it will make you happy. You deserve nothing less than pure pleasure,” pronounced Harry with force.

Touched by his remark, Seven articulated, “I suppose the wisest course of action would be to end my romantic relationship with Chakotay.” After a moment’s silence, she continued, “That thought is very satisfying to me. I appreciate your intervention for my sake.”

Harry graciously smiled and offered, “Anytime.” They sat in quiet for a moment, enjoying their meal and pondering their conversation. Then, Seven declared, “In spite of all the time we spent on _Voyager_, I never really took the time to know you. Many men aboard the ship appreciated my physical attributes but never made an effort to get to know the person I am underneath. Although this describes you early into my arrival on the ship, you later seemed to only see me for who I was inside. Why did you change when so many others did not?”

With an easy grin, Harry said truthfully and warmly, “The person you are is just as beautiful inside as outside.”

Seven was obviously pleased with this compliment, blushing slightly and saying, “That is very kind of you. I have missed having a good friend to talk to. Perhaps we could meet here again soon.”

Harry asked quietly, “As friends?”

Seven regarded him for a moment, then gave a curt nod and replied, “For now.”

Having received enough affirmation to satisfy him, Harry beamed and rejoined, “Very well.” Until they said their goodbyes, the two enjoyed the rest of their meal discussing many topics, but the one that burned in their minds was the conversation they’d had that would change them forever.

_2377, Six days after_ Voyager’s_ return_

Chakotay arrived promptly for at Seven’s quarters at the specified time. Her apartment at Starfleet headquarters was further away than the rest of the crew’s housing because she was now a Starfleet Academy professor, whereas most of the crew were just officers. They greeted each other with a hug, and then Chakotay came inside to find the table set and the food on the table. As they sat down, Chakotay commented, “This looks delicious.”

Seven answered as they began to eat, “I’m glad it pleases you.”

A rather uncomfortable silence fell over them, until Chakotay prodded, “So, how was your day?”

“Fine. The students are not exemplary but they do sufficient work,” responded Seven.

“Sounds typical,” remarked Chakotay.

“I suppose,” stated Seven as another period of quiet came over them. As they ate, Chakotay attempted to make conversation, but he found that Seven was not in a talkative mood. This, where she seemed to shut him out, had happened often lately. Finally, he gave up trying to chat and just waited for her to state what was concerning her.

At last, Seven took the initiative for the first time that evening and said rather abruptly, “We need to confer about our relationship.”

Without surprise, he asked, “What is there to discuss?”

Seven blurted out, “I think we should end our relationship.”

Chakotay’s face remained impassive, showing no hint of astonishment or disappointment as he inquired, “End it?”

Seven replied matter-of-factly, “Yes. In another future, we would have married. As it is, we have had many enjoyable experiences together. However, nothing has seemed the same since _Voyager_ returned to Earth. I no longer feel as if we share the closeness we did.”

Chakotay said with feeling, “Perhaps that is my fault. I have been so distracted since we came back.”

Seven answered with certainty, “No, it is more than that. On _Voyager_, we were both lonely. Thus, it was only natural that we would find comfort in each other. Here, much has changed.”

Chakotay demanded quietly, “You would chalk up everything we shared to loneliness?”

“No. Aboard _Voyager_, we shared something special. But, that spark seems to have dissipated. I hope this does not cause you anguish. Are you not in favor of our parting?” Seven quickly retaliated.

He considered his next words carefully before declaring, “I agree with what you have said. I’ve been feeling the same way, but I was afraid for you, Seven. This is a world you know nothing about.”

“I am capable. Besides, there is another _Voyager_ crewmember who has agreed to look after me,” Seven hinted with a gentle smile.

“You mean in a romantic way?” asked Chakotay slightly incredulously.

“I suppose that is Lieutenant Kim’s intent,” mused the woman.

“Harry?” pronounced Chakotay with surprise.

“That is his first name,” affirmed Seven with amusement.

He regarded her with puzzlement for a moment before ardently rejoining, “Well, if he makes you happy, I hope it will work out between you.”

Seven’s ice blue eyes met his dark brown ones as she sincerely replied, “Thank you, Chakotay.”

Their conversation hit an impediment as the pair pondered what had just transpired before Chakotay continued as he rose, “I suppose I had better be going.”

Seven also rose and walked him to the door, but then stated something that caused him to halt his departure. “Wait. I feel it is my duty to tell you to pursue your own love interests.”

“My own love interests?” inquired Chakotay.

“Everyone knows, Chakotay. Now that we are on Earth, it can work out between you and our former Captain,” revealed Seven.

He eyed her thoughtfully for a long moment as he studied her, as pain and then something new came into his eyes. Something that lit him up and made him seem stronger and more confident.

Seven believed it was hope.

“Perhaps. Thank you, Seven, for giving me new opportunities,” he stated softly and with great feeling as he took her hand for what they both knew would be the last time. He squeezed it gently and then released it, whispering, “Good-bye.”

“Good-bye,” returned Seven. And with that Captain Chakotay left behind the woman he had been dating, prospects for both of their futures gleaming bright.

_2377, Two weeks after_ Voyager’s_ return_

The former Commander Chakotay, now Captain Chakotay of the _U.S.S._ _Voyager_ boarded his ship. Since her return to Earth, she was being prepped for her next mission and modified to have the latest equipment. Although she was a fine ship, _Voyager _was seven years out of date, desperately needing new equipment and repairs.

Chakotay took the lift to the bridge. Following the usual, “Captain on the bridge”, Chakotay ordered his officers to return to as they were.

Chakotay asked aloud, "Where can I find the Vice Admiral?"

"In Astrometrics, sir," replied his pilot, a young but apparently skilled man.

“Thank you," responded Chakotay.

It had been just two weeks since the ship had first returned home. The crew had been treated with celebrity status, barely having time for the families they had so desperately wanted to see. Most of the crew, anyways, had been with their families. However, there were some like Chakotay who found that time had altered his relationship with his family, and, therefore, it was not the same. Hence, following his promotion to Captain, he had promptly accepted a confidential mission known by the code name, “The Zeta Assignment”.

This task would involve traveling to the nearby Cardena system, which was rumored to have a solution for the foremost problem on earth: energy. For the last couple of centuries, the scientists of Earth had set out trying to find new ways to generate power. It was believed that the Cardena system housed several different types of organic molecules that could be harvested and harnessed to provide Earth with energy. These molecules had been code named “Zeta particles”, and the assignment was thus named. 

After descending several floors and walking through numerous halls, Chakotay halted in front of the room known as the Astrometrics Lab, or usually just Astrometrics. He was uncertain what he would say. Last time he had seen his former Captain was when they had said their painful goodbyes at the Welcoming Reception where they had all been promoted. Last time Chakotay had seen Kathryn Janeway, he and Seven were still together. Pushing these thoughts aside and taking a deep breath, he opened the door and entered the room.

Vice Admiral Janeway had her back turned when her former commander walked in. She appeared to be examining something on the PADD in her hand. However, the noise of the door caused her to turn sharply. "Chakotay!" She exclaimed in obvious delight. Dropping the work she was doing, Kathryn Janeway stepped over to him and gave her former commander a brief yet warm embrace. Sobering as she pulled away, but leaving her hand on his shoulder, Kathryn asked, "How have you been?"

"I've been very well, but I miss the crew." He answered with an ironic smile. "All this time trying to get home, yet I spend half my days wishing I was back on _Voyager_. How about you?"

With a slightly pained smile, Janeway said, "Just fine." Although she was clearly anything but this, Chakotay did not press her. She continued, "It must be a real delight for you to captain this ship. Starfleet allowed me the pleasure of serving alongside you on your first mission, but demoted me to act as commander. You and I will be caring for this ship and her crew again, but, this time, you have helm.” Kathryn gave him a smile, but it did not quite reach her eyes. “How are you and Seven?" She inquired curiously.

He glanced away for a second before meeting her eyes. "We're....not. I thought she could make me happy, but…it just didn’t work out between us." he replied, watching as the Vice Admiral's eyes widened just perceptively. "It turned out she found someone else. She's been going out with Harry Kim for about a week now."

Kathryn gave him a puzzled glance, saying in a thoughtful tone, "Harry mentioned he was dating a beautiful blonde, but I never thought he meant Seven." She turned her head to the side and mused accusingly, "I wonder why he didn’t tell me?"

"I wanted to tell you myself," answered Chakotay.

Janeway brought her head up from thoughtfully studying her shoes, giving him one of her half smiles that he knew so well. "Chakotay..." She began emotionally.

At that moment, the door clicked open, and another officer walked in. "Commander, I was told to bring these reports to you immediately," commented the young man named Retin. Stepping away from his conversation with his former Captain, Chakotay took the reports from the man and said, "Thank you, Ensign Retin." The man nodded respectfully and left the room.

Chakotay turned to make a quip to Kathryn about unfortunate timing, but she had already turned away, continuing her investigation using the advanced computers in the lab. Chakotay closed his eyes and sighed with regret and sadness. The moment between them was lost. Her voice just a tad more tremulous than usual, the Vice Admiral commented, "Look at this. The entire planet is covered in this material." The moment lost, the Captain stepped up to help his acting Commander with the analysis of her findings.

_2377, Two weeks and one day after_ Voyager’s_ return_

Kathryn Janeway of the _U.S.S. Voyager_ stepped into her quarters. “Computer, what time is it?” The Vice Admiral inquired. Upon being told the time, Kathryn sighed. With just ten minutes before she was to report to the Captain’s quarters, she only had time to change into a clean uniform, although she had been hoping to review the data she had uncovered. Janeway had reunited with Chakotay yesterday in Astrometrics, but had not seen him since. It was then that he had insisted that Kathryn join him for dinner, just as she always had on _Voyager_. Despite her momentary misgivings, she had agreed and was now looking forward to it.

The ten minutes passed rapidly, and, before she knew it, Kathryn stood in front of the Captain’s quarter’s. After hearing the beep of the door, Chakotay said, “Come in”.

The acting Commander walked into Chakotay’s quarters. The metallic walls in the dim room surrounded the small table laden with food. “Hello,” greeted Chakotay.

“Hello there. I see you have prepared dinner,” stated Kathryn.

“Yes, well, I happen to understand that you hate cooking,” replied Chakotay.

Laughing as she sat down, Kathryn stated, “You know me well.”

Returning her smile, the Captain said, “Besides, I didn’t want to risk angering a Vice Admiral.”

“Chakotay, for this mission, I am simply your Commander,” responded Janeway with a smile.

“I suppose you’re right. I could get used to that, you know,” mused Chakotay kiddingly.

Keeping up the light banter, Kathryn retorted, “Yes, well, just don’t get too used to it.”

With a smile, Chakotay relented, “All right, I won’t, Commander.” A moment of silence fell upon the pair. Their conversation took a more serious and personal as Chakotay questioned Kathryn, “So, what have you done since we returned?”

She stared at her plate for a moment before replying, “Well, I traveled home to Indiana. I visited my mother and sister, who are both doing well. And…I saw Mark.”

Referring to her ex-fiancé, Chakotay asked gently, “How did it go with Mark?”

A mixed expression came over Kathryn’s face as she replied with mild bitterness, “Well, let’s just say his wife is very nice. And his children are adorable.”

“I’m sorry, Kathryn,” he sympathized.

“Don’t, please. My mother and sister reacted the same way,” complained his acting commander.

“Yes, but I feel this way because I care about you, not because I long to intrude on your life,” Chakotay reminded her. The sweet, genuine smile Kathryn gave her current captain warmed his heart as he reached across the table and squeezed her hand. Something beeped, drawing him to release her and step away. “Would you like some dessert?” inquired Chakotay. “It’s a Cardena favorite.”

“What is it? If it is as strange as some of the desserts considered delicacies on other planets, I’ll pass,” stated Kathryn firmly.

“No, it is not exotic at all. It is a type of thick caramel pudding over a moist pound cake,” laughed Chakotay.

“Well, in that case, I’ll have some,” answered Janeway with a pleased smile. As he served her, she queried, “So, you heard about my life. What have you done since we returned from the Delta Quadrant?”

“You already know that Seven and I broke up. Well, actually, she broke up with me. In the week following our return, she became very close with Harry Kim. Apparently, he has made her very happy,” Chakotay stated.

“I’m sorry, Chakotay. But, I never did see you two as being a good fit for each other.” Katherine responded.

“Well, that’s apparent now, I suppose. Anyway, I also got to see my sister,” pronounced the Captain.

“Yes, I seem to remember you mentioning her. Yergha, the sibling you got along with so well until you left Earth, was very special to you. How is she?” answered Kathryn.

“Angry and bitter,” said Chakotay irately.

“But, you always had told me that she was a ray of sunshine,” protested Kathryn.

“Well, I suppose that losing her brother to the Delta Quadrant, her husband in battle, and her child in an accident changed her irrevocably,” revealed Chakotay.

“It’s my turn to say, ‘I’m sorry’,” stated Kathryn sympathetically.

“At least my brother was there with her. I think he became a rock for her in those times,” asserted the former Commander.

“I wasn’t aware you had a brother,” puzzled Kathryn.

“He was never around when we were growing up. I suppose he despised living on Earth about as much as we did. It was quite a shock to see him at home again. He was a different person,” intoned Chakotay.

“Everything’s changed so much. Tell me, if you could keep one thing the same from before, what would it be?” questioned Kathryn as she finished the last bit of her dessert.

“I would have our friendship remain the same. It was complicated, but we cared,” Chakotay asserted quietly.

“I couldn’t have said it better myself. That’s what I want to continue unchanged also,” smiled Kathryn.

Looking deep into her eyes, Chakotay pleaded, “Let’s not let our friendship become a casualty of our return to Earth.”

“Agreed,” affirmed Janeway resolutely. The meal completed, she rose from the table and commented, “That was lovely, Chakotay. You cook so well, and I enjoyed your company. Thank you.”

“The pleasure is all mine, but we must do this again,” ordered Chakotay.

She paused for a moment before opening the door, turning and saying, “Aye, Captain. We will indeed. Good bye.”

Chakotay began to clear the dishes, thoughts of his company during the meal swimming in his head.

_2377, Two weeks and two days after_ Voyager’s_ return_

Acting Commander Kathryn Janeway stood in the elevator of the starship, _Voyager_. She tapped the combadge over her heart and said, “Janeway to Chakotay”.

The response came back immediately, “Chakotay here. Go ahead.”

“I have those reports on the Zeta particle that you requested,” continued Janeway.

“Good. Bring them to me as soon as possible,” ordered Chakotay.

“On my way. Janeway out,” replied Kathryn.

The elevator arrived at the bridge, and the acting Commander stepped out and headed straight to Chakotay’s ready room on the right. Upon pressing the bell to enter, the doors slid open, and she was greeted by Chakotay. “What did you find?” he inquired.

“Not much, unfortunately. There has been only one encounter with the Cardenians, and let’s just say it didn’t end well for the humans,” stated Janeway as she handed the desk to him and began pacing the floor.

“What about the Zeta particle?” asked Chakotay.

“It’s as mysterious as its host planet. The only reason we are on this mission is because the Starfleet scans of nearby planets picked up this molecule as having the potential to provide Earth with its required energy. The electromagnetic properties of this substance have been shown under simulation to amply do its job,” Janeway mentioned.

“Sounds too good to be true,” stated Chakotay.

Kathryn stopped pacing for a brief moment and looked at him, commenting, “That’s what I thought. Frankly, I don’t even know why the Cardenians agreed.”

“Well, it’s a trade. They are getting something out of it,” responded Chakotay.

“But, after so many years of silence and withholding, why now?” pondered Kathryn.

“This negotiation was not something sudden. It took years to come to decent terms with these people,” Chakotay reminded her.

“I suppose. But, you know, despite their technological advancements, I don’t think the Cardenians recognize the full potential of this molecule they call ‘Ahtna’,” remarked Kathryn.

“Perhaps you’re right,” agreed Chakotay.

“Are you sure it is a good idea to have just the two of us complete this mission? I think it might be better to have a bit more man power,” suggested Kathryn.

“I’m sure. You and I are perfectly capable, and, if something goes wrong, we won’t be endangering as many people,” remarked Chakotay.

“Yes, sir. That sounds reasonable,” she concurred.

“Thank you, though, Commander. Your opinion’s invaluable,” said Chakotay warmly.

“As you said yesterday, the pleasure is mine,” returned Janeway as she went leave. “Oh, and Chakotay, you make a fine Captain,” she declared softly.

“Thank you, Kathryn,” replied Chakotay as he watched his acting Commander leave.

_2377, Two weeks and three days after_ Voyager’s_ return_

Chakotay sat alone at a table in the mess hall near lunch, enjoying his non-replicated meal while studying the data on his PADD (Personal Access Display Device). He was so intent on his study that he did not see Kathryn Janeway approach him. “May I join you?” She startled him by asking.

“Kathryn! Please,” he replied, glancing up at her with pleasure and putting down his PADD.

As she settled in, the Vice Admiral stated good-naturedly, “I didn’t expect to see you here.”

With an easy smile, the Captain returned, “Well, the walls of my quarters became boring, so I decided to see what sustenance my crew has been subjected to. Turns out I've been the deprived one. This food tastes much better than anything from a replicator.”

“I agree,” said Kathryn with a smile.

“So what brings you here? Wait, let me guess. Your replicator malfunctioned again,” teased Chakotay.

Glancing hastily up from her food, Kathryn regarded him for a moment, fighting a smile. Then, she burst out laughing. “How did you know?” she demanded.

“You haven’t changed!” he replied earnestly, grinning from ear to ear.

“Well, it has only been two weeks,” stated Kathryn, gently breaking their light banter.

With a fading smile, Chakotay sighed, studying his food for a moment before bringing his dark brown eyes up to meet her gray-blue ones. “Two weeks and three days, but it feels like a lifetime,” he remarked rather somberly.

“Yes, yes, it does,” whispered the acting Commander. A moment of quiet came over the two as moments from the past two weeks flashed through their heads.

“Do you miss _Voyager_?” inquired Chakotay suddenly, interrupting the easy silence that had stretched out for a moment.

Without a moment’s hesitation, Janeway answered seriously, “Every moment. You spend seven years trying to hold something together to attain a goal. Then, when the objective becomes a reality, everything-everyone-you worked so hard to keep together separates in a hundred and fifty different directions.”

“I know what you mean. How are you handling it?” inquired the Captain.

“The same way you are: trying to bury my feelings by hiding myself from the real world by working long, hard hours,” responded Kathryn frankly.

Although he heard the slight accusation in her tone, Chakotay was more interested in the factor that Kathryn had admitted she overworked, a habit she had never seemed to overcome. However, he knew better than to follow up on that, so he simply took her remarks as sign that his acting Commander was finally dropping her guard and led the conversation down a different route by reminding her, “But, you don't have to hide. I've heard there are many important men who wish to get to know you better.”

With a regretful smile, Kathryn Janeway retorted calmly, “No. These men want to be acquainted with Vice Admiral Janeway, former Captain of the _U.S.S. Voyager_.”

Chakotay warmly inserted, “Who happens to be beautiful, intelligent, and strong.”

Acknowledging his compliments with a broad smile and the casting down of her eyes, Kathryn continued, “But, they don’t want to understand Kathryn Janeway, the girl who grew up in Indiana, who has a mother and a sister, and who has lost two fiancées.”

Sympathetically, the Captain answered, “So, loneliness is hitting you hard too.”

She met his eyes quickly, defensively asserting, “Well, I wouldn’t say that.”

Realizing he had hit on a sensitive spot and was unexpectedly in dangerous territory, Chakotay backtracked and comforted her by emphasizing quietly, “You don’t have to become resistant with me, Kathryn. I won’t judge or criticize you. I’m your friend.”

She closed her eyes briefly, exposing her vulnerability, gave him a small smile, and rejoined in a softened tone, “And a finer friend I've never had. I'm sorry, Chakotay. These last few weeks have been tough, but there's no one I trust more than you. Just being here talking to you has helped me, and you truly have lightened my burden.”

Her last sentence caught him off guard. Gazing straight into her eyes, he responded seriously, “No, it is you who have helped me. Thank you, Kathryn.”

Chakotay watched as Kathryn’s eyes moistened, and, without breaking her gaze, he snuck his hand under the table, and clasped her hand in his. The smile she gave him was all the affirmation he needed to not pull away.

A voice abruptly brought them out of their reverie. The cook had come over to ask, “Anyone for dessert?”

Reluctantly, Chakotay pulled his hand away and straightened up as Kathryn replied, “No, thank you. The meal was quite wonderful and very satisfying.”

The Captain stated, “I’ll pass also.” With a nod, the cook moved on, leaving the pair in companionable silence. Something had changed between them over the course of this meal. Kathryn had let her guard down, giving Chakotay a glance at just how she really felt. And, he knew, this opportunity for them to know each other better than ever before was certainly no mistake.

“Chakotay to the bridge,” came a voice from the Captain’s combadge.

Tapping his combadge, Chakotay answered, “Be right there.” Remorsefully, he told his lunch companion, “Duty calls.”

As he stood and prepared to leave, Kathryn wondered aloud with a slight eye roll, “Doesn’t it always?”

“Yes, it does,” he replied seriously, but continued with an impulsive grin, “Someday I’m going to do something about it.” His expression grew solemn again as he persisted, “Remember, Kathryn, the future is yours and mine-ours-to make.”

“I’ll hold you to that, Captain,” responded Kathryn Janeway with a twinkle in her eyes. After watching him leave, she consumed a few more bites of food before bringing her plate up to be recycled. Perhaps she should not have been so vulnerable with him, but he was her best friend. Gratefulness for Chakotay and his ever-present listening ear filled her as she left for the bridge, happier than she had been in two weeks and two days.

_2377, Two weeks and three days after_ Voyager’s_ return_

As he sat in his Ready Room studying the data about the planet of Cardena, Captain Chakotay’s combadge chirped, “Captain, we are approaching Cardena.”

“Prepare to send the shuttle. Chakotay out,” he answered. Then, after pausing for a moment, he tapped his combadge and said, “Chakotay to Janeway.”

The response was instantaneous, “Janeway here.”

“We’re here. Report to Cargo Bay Two,” he ordered.

“On my way,” she answered. He left his Ready Room immediately, so when he stepped off of the turbolift and walked through the dull hallway to the cargo bay, it was completely empty.

He climbed into the shuttle and began configuring the sensors. When his traveling companion arrived, Chakotay teased, “I was beginning to wonder if you had changed your mind.”

Kathryn retorted with a smile, “You can’t get rid of me that easily.”

He answered, “I know, and I’m glad. You all ready?”

“Let’s do it,” she stated with a thread of excitement in her voice. As they left _Voyager_, the two sat in companionable silence, eventually making small talk about the information they had been given regarding the Cardenians.

“The past human experience with these people was not good. Be prepared for anything,” remarked Chakotay, with whom Janeway readily agreed. Their trip to the planet was uneventful, as they made it through the atmospheric security and landed without problems. There, they were greeted by Cardenians.

The people of this planet had a humanoid shape, but their bodies were larger and more robust. However, this was where the similarities ended. Their skin was the color of faded copper and had a mottled appearance. The rest of their bodies were indiscernible beneath their metallic uniforms, but the past studies of the Cardenians showed that their anatomy varied quite a bit from that of humans.

The capital of Cardena, Yitri, was a sprawling urban area that was filled with shiny metal structures. However, a closer glance indicated that the city was not as pristine as it seemed. It looked as though a catastrophe had struck recently, judging from the holes in many of the buildings and the refuse collected between the skyscrapers.

The shuttle from _Voyager_ landed in the closest hanger to the capitol building. Upon exiting their small craft, Chakotay and Kathryn were greeted by a member of the Cardenian government who led them into the building. Inside, the pair marveled at the uniqueness of the structure. From the outside, the skyscraper looked perfectly normal. On the inside, it was anything but that. The top was glass, sending streams of light spiraling to the floor. Stairs and rooms twisted at all angles above the ground floor, in ways that seemed to defy physics. As the Captain and his Commander climbed into the clear elevator which began its ascent, they gazed unabashedly in awe of the strange, chaotic elegancy of the interior of the building. The Cardenian official, named Rewgh, informed them as the elevator came to a halt on the top floor, “We will be meeting with Supreme Officer Nokret in the conference room.”

Upon exiting the elevator, Chakotay and Janeway were led to a simple room that looked much like the debriefing room aboard _Voyager_. Aside from Supreme Officer Nokret, the leader of Cardena, there were two other Cardenians in the room: one who appeared to be a security officer and the other who seemed to be an aide. Nokret was very serious, accepting the Federation payment with no questions. Chakotay felt his blood pressure elevate, and, discretely glancing at Kathryn, he saw that she too was on edge. Then, with a wave of his hand, the associate Cardenian turned around, punched a code into the wall and then withdrew a clear but thick container. Inside of it, a large, bright yellow molecule floated. “This is Ahtna,” stated Nokret with a heavy, grave tone as the aide handed it to Chakotay. Nokret then ordered, “Seize them.”

Two more armed guards stepped through a panel in the wall. Chakotay and Janeway swiftly pulled out their phasers, the ones they kept hidden in their boots. “Stand down.” Chakotay ordered quietly.

“You’ll never escape. We have you,” remarked Nokret.

“Just you wait and see,” returned Chakotay with the phaser in one hand and the container containing the Zeta Particle in the other. He looked fleetingly at Kathryn and could see that she was configuring the transport back to their ship. New technology they had acquired on Earth enabled them to beam out directly and simply, on remote command, when needed. However, the sensors needed a few moments to reconfigure and work properly. Buying them time, Chakotay asked, “Why? Why would you do this to us?”

“Look around you! You can see for yourself the devastation this planet has faced. A recent rebel uprising caused this, and we need a way to repair the damage. Our economy is in ruins. The only way is to trade with someone not from our planet, and the single thing we have of value to others is Ahtna. But, Ahtna is sacred. We could not possibly trade it,” sighed Nokret.

“I’m sorry to hear that,” remarked Chakotay as the transporters fired up and both he and Janeway dematerialized before the eyes of Nokret and his colleagues.

“That was close,” observed Janeway. “Let’s just hope they don’t send an air squad after us.”

“They can’t afford to. This planet is in deep ruin. Once we get past the atmospheric security, we’ll be okay,” declared Chakotay as he set the molecule in the back, erected the previously configured containment field, and took the helm.

“We’d better hurry,” worried Kathryn. They flew their shuttle out of the hangar, relieved that no force fields held them in. They lifted off and entered the atmosphere. Working the sensors, she said, “Two ships on the port side!”

“Evasive pattern beta four!” he cried just as the ship shook.

“Direct hit to the targeting sensors,” asserted Kathryn, knowing that returning fire was no longer an option. Chakotay shook his head just as another blast caused the shuttle to shudder and an incessant beeping began. “The turbulence has caused the molecule to break free of its container, and the containment field around the Zeta Particle is destabilizing,” she explained.

“Reconfigure it,” Chakotay ordered.

“I can’t. Remote controls are down. I’ll have to do it manually,” she said.

“Be careful,” he commanded her.

Kathryn climbed into the back and began to frantically push buttons, trying to get the field to hold. The ship took another blast and it began to waver. One more hit to the shuttle and the field would breach, allowing the molecule to be in an unconstrained environment. The Zeta Particle had never roamed free, for its potential power was too great. Thus, it was impossible to speculate what would occur if this happened.

Janeway rerouted power to the field and reconfigured it just as the ship was hit with another blast. As the computer attempted to obey her commands, a part of the Zeta Particle about the size of a quarter breached the field, striking her just as the shield reinitialized. Chakotay had turned his head to look at her just as she was hit. He saw the molecule go straight through her, and then burst through the metal of the ship and go into the surrounding atmosphere. The explosion of the particle was just brief enough that it made a thunderous noise but did not shake the shuttle.

Since the ship had just moved beyond the range of the Cardenian ships, the Captain set the shuttle on autopilot and repaired the hull breach. He then bent down and held Kathryn in his arms. She was unconscious and had only a faint pulse. Silent tears traveled down his cheeks as he whispered, “You can’t go. You can’t. There’s still so much I need to say.” But, she only lay there, ever so still.

Suddenly, the ship began say, “Warning, autopilot failing.” All the damage from the Cardenian ships had caused a massive power drain on the ship, so Chakotay reluctantly lay Kathryn back down on the floor and returned to the front. Wiping the tears he had not even known were there, he began to manually fly the ship back to _Voyager_ so that Kathryn could get the medical attention she required so desperately.

Chakotay slapped his combadge and said, “Chakotay to Voyager”.

The voice of his chief tactical officer came through, “We’re here, Sir.”

Chakotay replied, “As soon as we get in, beam Admiral Janeway directly to sick bay and set a course for Earth.”

“Aye, Sir,” came the answer. The rest of the journey seemed to take forever. Chakotay flew as quickly as he could, but every minute that passed seemed like an hour. He could fairly feel the life fading out of Kathryn.

At long last, _Voyager _came into view. The only other time Chakotay had ever been so happy to see something was when Earth appeared on the view screen after their seven year sojourn. He pulled into the shuttle bay as Kathryn shimmered and disappeared into Sick Bay. Chakotay shut off the engines and left the shuttle, hastening to Sick Bay. When he entered the doors, Doctor Heynman working to save Kathryn as, somewhere, a monitor was beeping warnings. He stated, “We're losing her. Cortical stimulator, 100 kilojoules.”

Chakotay speedily complied and handed it to him. Kathryn’s body tensed up, but nothing happened to the incessant beeping that belied the gravity of her condition. “Again!” commanded Dr. Heynman. Once more, she jolted with the shock, but this time the machine fell silent.

With a relieved sigh, the Doctor informed Chakotay, “It appears that she has stabilized.”

Janeway murmured, “Chakotay!” He immediately jumped to her side.

At Chakotay’s questioning look, Dr. Heynman scanned her and declared, “She will be delirious until she awakes. I have never seen anything like this. All of her internal damage has been repaired, but anytime I try to wake her, I simply cannot. She begins to go into neural shock. For now, I can keep her steady in an unconscious state, but we will lose her if we don't solve this in the next 24 hours.”

Chakotay told him, “It was this particle that we collected on the planet. It breached the containment field and struck her like a primitive Earth bullet. I am not very familiar with the substance, but I can get you a sample.”

“Please. It would greatly increase my chances of finding a cure,” said the Doctor.

At that moment, Chakotay’s combadge summoned him to the Bridge. He glanced questioningly at the Doctor, who assured him that there was nothing he could do right now.

The Captain bore his eyes straight into the Doctor’s and directed him, “If there is any change, notify me.” He glanced worriedly at his friend lying on the biobed before he turned and left.

As soon as his shift was over, Chakotay returned to Sick Bay. The first word in his worried mind that found its way out of his mouth as he walked to her bedside was, “Anything?”

Doctor Heynman briefly glanced up from his work to look at the Captain before telling him, “I am closer to developing a treatment. It should be ready in 3 hours, whence I will administer it.”

Without hesitation, Chakotay replied, “I'll stay.”

The Doctor eyed him, stood up, walked to the biobed and advised him, “I recommend that you sleep. I will call you when I am finished.”

Chakotay insisted, “No, I'll be right here.”

The Doctor answered, “All right, suit yourself.” He turned to return to his research station when he paused and glanced back at Chakotay. Heynman told him, “You should know that she called out for you repeatedly. According to your imbedded medical records on this ship, you both called out for each other whenever the other was in sickbay.”

Chakotay said nothing, only gave him an ironic smile before asking, “Could this become common knowledge?”

Doctor Heynman considered this for a moment before answering, “Well, no. Only the doctor aboard _Voyager_ has access to the information stored in the imbedded records.”

The Captain gave him a calculating glance and pronounced, “Let's keep it that way. Don't say anything to anyone.” He paused before continuing, “But, thank you for telling me. “

The Doctor chalked up Chakotay’s testiness about leaving to the stress of possibly losing Kathryn and simply responded, “My pleasure.”

Chakotay sat by her side and held her hand. There were many times he had held this hand. Sometimes, it was his lifeline. Other times, his was hers. Regardless, he remembered each occasion with perfect clarity and was certain she did as well. Lost in his thoughts, time-and his exhaustion-became irrelevant. He was almost startled when the Doctor informed him, “I am ready to try the treatment.”

Chakotay demanded, “Are you sure it is safe?" 

“As sure as I can be. I ran a few simulations, and it worked,” he answered.

The response from Chakotay was swift, “It's her life at stake.”

The Doctor, with the same speed, retaliated, “It’s the best I can give you.”

They regarded each other for a moment in a nearly hostile way before Chakotay broke down. Fatigued and apprehensive, he agreed, “Let's do it.”

Doctor Heynman injected the hypospray, containing an agent to counteract the toxin he had discovered had been produced by the Zeta particle in her blood, into her neck. He warned Chakotay, “It will wake her temporarily, and then she will fall back into a natural sleep.”

After a very tense moment of extreme stillness, Kathryn Janeway’s eyes fluttered open, revealing her dark gray-blue eyes. She appeared disoriented and tried to sit up.

Chakotay held her down and informed her, the relief barely hidden in his voice, “Take it easy. You've had a hard jolt.”

“The Zeta particle?” She questioned anxiously.

He put her fears to rest by saying, “Contained.” She closed her eyelids in obvious relief. Chakotay continued, “The Doctor here saved your life. The remnants of the particle in your blood would have killed you in next 24 hours if he hadn't created antidote. “

Wearily, she glanced at him and sincerely stated, “Thank you, Doctor Heynman.”

Thankful for the ease of her awakening, the Doctor replied, “My pleasure.” An awkward silence fell for a moment as the Doctor stepped back, scanned her, and monitored her vital signs. “I'll give you two some space,” he stated as he returned to the main computer and his research station.

“What time is it?” Kathryn wanted to know.

“0200 hours,” answered Chakotay.

Slowly, and with effort, she posed the question, “How long have you been here?”

He gave her a reassuring smile as he told her, “A while. You were calling out for me. Apparently, it's something we've always done when either of us was in Sick Bay.”

“Oh, Chakotay,” she began, obviously wanting to say more, but every word seemed to require a great effort.

The Captain filled in the space of silence and said as he gently rubbed her hand, “I almost lost you today. “ Janeway was struggling for words, and her weariness was overcoming her. He assured her, “It's alright. You can go back to sleep.”

An uncharacteristic tear tracked its way down her cheek, and as he wiped it off, she begged, “Please, stay for a while.”

Chakotay comforted her by telling her, “I'm not going anywhere. I'll be right here with you, Kathryn.”

As he stated these words, Kathryn Janeway closed her eyes. Chakotay glanced fearfully at Doctor, who whispered, “Natural sleep.”

With weary joy, Chakotay asked, “So, she should be all right?”

“Yes, she should be fine. I expect her to be nearly completely recovered by the time she awakes in the morning. Would you like me to stay for a while?” Doctor Heynman inquired.

“No, get some rest. You can come back in the morning. If there is an emergency, you should be auto notified,” Chakotay ordered him.

“Yes, Captain. Good night, sir,” responded the Doctor.

Chakotay looked at him and said, “Good night, and thank you.”

With an abrupt nod, Doctor Heynman left Sick Bay. Chakotay stayed by Kathryn Janeway’s side and watched her sleep, unable to do so himself, knowing the anxiety of today would haunt him for a long while.

_2377, Two weeks and four days after_ Voyager’s_ return_

It had been a long, grueling day for Admiral Kathryn Janeway. She had been cleared for duty today, after a lengthy-and at times heated-discussion with Doctor Heynman and Chakotay. But, at this moment, she was regretting her stubbornness and was wishing she had just taken the day off.

Throughout the day, there had not been a moment of quiet on the Bridge, but always something: an anomaly or subspace disruptions or the like. Right now, she wanted nothing more than to close her eyes and fall asleep, but first she had to eat something. She unbuttoned the outer layer of her Starfleet uniform and draped it over a chair, much more relaxed in her long sleeved gray shirt. 

Janeway had just laid out her food on the table when the door chimed. Instinctively, she knew it would be Chakotay. “Come in,” she called out. Chakotay entered, still wearing his entire uniform. He held one hand behind his back, sheltering something from her view. At her curious glance, he approached her and revealed the rose his hidden hand held. She smiled a sweet smile and thanked him sincerely. “Oh, Chakotay, it’s beautiful,” she stated. It reminded her of the occurrence when she had been caught in a strange sort of dream where she died countless times. After she had been saved, he had presented her with a red rose much like this one.

Chakotay returned her brilliant smile, but then sobered and stated, “You scared me yesterday.”

Kathryn answered softly, “It shook me up pretty badly too. It made me rethink a lot of things.”

“Me too,” agreed Chakotay.

With a teasing smile as she sat and motioned for him to sit across from her, Kathryn inquired, “Care to share?”

This was the moment he had been waiting for, and the purpose for which he had come. With great sincerity, Chakotay began, “There’s something I’ve been wanting to tell you for a long time, but the right time never came. Lately, I’ve become aware just how much we really need to have this conversation. Kathryn, please let me speak. Don’t interrupt, just let me say it.”

At her very slightly hesitant nod, he took a deep breath as moments from their long friendship flashed in kaleidoscope fashion before his eyes.

They had started out as enemies, but when they were thrust across the galaxy, Janeway and Chakotay had formed an uneasy alliance. When their crews were forced to merge, they had become first cautious and then close friends, but never lovers. The only time they had come close to crossing line of their deepening friendship was when they had been trapped on New Earth. Both had been reluctant to act other their feelings, perhaps because of the inevitableness of their rescue. Upon their saving, they had wordlessly settled on close friendship that had roots in love and involved some occasional, gentle flirting.

Pushing these thoughts aside, Chakotay declared, “When we started out, you had Mark. But, as the journey continued, you began to slowly let go. Throughout the voyage, there was never anyone serious for either of us, only a passing person or alien. We were never deeply involved partially because the circumstances weren’t right, but also because neither of us was comfortable with the idea. Not until Seven, anyways.

I want to tell you that I made a mistake. She and I were both lonely, so at the time it seemed perfectly natural. In another timeline, Seven and I would have been married and fallen in love. But, in this one, I think we only experienced infatuation. I was just trying to be nice to her, and, honestly, I was flattered by her attentions. I was going to explain to you that I didn’t really love her, but I never got the chance. I found myself caring for Seven a little more every day. But, when I saw the Admiral, I began to feel uncomfortable with the idea of being with Seven. I couldn’t let you become the woman that came aboard our ship. With our return to the Alpha Quadrant, you and I were no longer a foreign concept. But, I couldn’t just abandon Seven. Earth was a place she knew nothing about. I knew I didn’t love her, yet I couldn’t just end our relationship and leave her alone. Truly, the only time following our return that I was truly happy was the Captain-Commander dance we shared. Not to sound cruel, but when Seven broke up with me, I could not have been more pleased. Kathryn, I love you. It’s taken over seven years for us to reach this point. On _Voyager_, in the Delta Quadrant, we were both uncomfortable with the idea of a Command team that began dating while serving aboard their ship. But, that’s no longer an issue. Throughout the years, we’ve had countless arguments, but our friendship never deteriorated. I hope that my being with Seven will not keep you from me now.”

Chakotay reached across the table, past her soup that had long lost its heat. He gently grabbed her small hand with his larger one. It was then that he noticed the tears that had made tracks down her cheeks. Kathryn swallowed hard for a moment, and then whispered, “I love you. You have been my strength through all the rough parts of our journey, and I always knew I could count on you. Chakotay, your relationship with Seven hurt me very badly, but I understood. If we had continued on in the Delta Quadrant, I would have put on a straight face and let you be with her. Here, I did the same thing because I thought it was you wanted. I’m very glad to hear otherwise. But, Seven is a special lady, so I am relieved that you didn’t reconcile with me at her expense. ”

“Always putting your crew first,” he murmured as, her hand still tightly in his, Chakotay pulled Kathryn to him and his lips met hers for the first time. It was a sweet and gentle first kiss, filled with the affections they had buried for so long. When they parted, Chakotay squeezed her hand and posed the question, “So, what’s next?”

Kathryn mulled over this for a brief moment before saying, “Well, how about a date?”

Chakotay replied quickly, “Several.” At this, broad grins spread across the faces of this pair like they had been told an amusing joke.

They sat for a moment, their hands entwined. Then, she stated in reference to their relationship, “And to think we almost let this get away.”

“I wasn’t about to give up that easily,” insisted Chakotay.

“Oh, really?” teased Kathryn with a gentle smile.

His smile was relieved but serious as he answered, “Really.”

And so they sat, late into the night, planning the future. When Chakotay left for his quarters, he kissed her goodnight and said with heartfelt warmth, “See you tomorrow, Kathryn.”

“Good night,” she answered as his hand withdrew from hers. It was so very natural for Chakotay to be next to her that his absence was disquieting. Yet, they both slept better that night than they had in over seven years.

_2377, Two weeks and six days after_ Voyager’s_ return_

As Earth came into view, _Voyager _was hailed by Admiral Paris. Chakotay had sent a report to this Admiral, but it gave few details other than that the mission had been a success. The rest, Chakotay figured, he would fill the Admiral in on later. Having faced countless deadly enemies in the Delta Quadrant, it struck Chakotay as ironic that as he rose and gave the order to have the Admiral put on screen, a twinge of apprehension shot through him. He stole a brief glance at Kathryn, who was sitting in the Commander’s chair and seemed as collected as always but, he thought, slightly amused. Chakotay knew that she could read him like a book and had sensed his sudden trepidation.

Admiral Paris’ face appeared on the screen of their beloved ship. Impassively, he stated, “I received your report that the mission was a success."  
  
Chakotay answered confidently, “Yes, sir.”  
  
Admiral Paris continued, “Did you encounter any difficulties?”

Pausing a moment and considering how much he should say, Chakotay took a deep breath and informed his superior, “If you count that the Cardenians nearly killed us and that the object of our mission almost took the life of Admiral Janeway, then yes.”

Obviously surprised, Admiral Paris cleared his throat and responded, “There is clearly a lot I haven't heard. At the earliest convenience, I expect both you and the Admiral, with your FULL report in hand, to come to my office.”

Chakotay answered, “Yes, sir." 

“Welcome home, Captain. Mission complete,” replied the Admiral with what some would have called a smile.

“Thank you, sir,” said Chakotay, who did grin. As soon as the view screen deactivated, he returned to his seat. He exchanged a glance with Kathryn who looked as though she was trying to hid a full out smile.

She gave up and laughed quietly as she gently teased him, “I’ve seen you face the Borg with less anxiety than you had just now.”

“Being a Captain is harder than it looks,” he returned in the same tone Kathryn had used.

“Really?” she inquired with a twinkle in her eye.

“Trust me,” the Captain answered as he reached across the console that separated them and gave her hand a subtle squeeze. 

“Oh, I do. More than anyone,” she rejoined softly.

Chakotay released Kathryn’s hand, catching her blue eyes with his shadowy brown ones for a fraction of a moment before he raised his chin, looked directly ahead, straightened in his chair, and ordered his helmsman, “Take us down.” With that, _Voyager_ began its descent to Earth, another mission successfully completed at the orders of the Command team of Chakotay and Kathryn Janeway.


End file.
